Maybe it’s best to stop jotting down my dreams

i-dont-always-remember-my-dreamsI’ve heard that as you grow older you sleep less, and that’s certainly the case with me. I frequently wake up during the night, and may or may not go back to sleep.

Not wanting to waste those fitful middle-of-the-night moments, I’ll sometimes check my smartphone, looking for west coast baseball scores, or maybe try to find the answer to whatever question occurs to me in the middle of the night.

I’ve also used my phone to jot down dreams I don’t want to forget, like the one I wrote about here. The problems crop up the next morning when I try to make sense of the words I wrote in the hours before dawn. Words like these:

The evidence of dementia is right there on my iPhone. Stoic dickweed? WTF?
The evidence of dementia is right there on my iPhone. Stoic dickweed? WTF? Why did I write that in the middle of the night?

Stoic dickweed???

I remembered that I’d written a note last night, but I didn’t write any details. Who’s a stoic dickweed? You, perhaps?

Certainly there’s no one among my current acquaintances who rises to that level of contempt, and curiously enough, “dickweed” isn’t even among my preferred cuss words, so where did it come from?

Delving deeper into my past, in 33 years in the newspaper business I met plenty of stoics, and also more than my fair share of dickweeds, but I’m stumped to recall any former associate who was both stoic and a dickweed.

Oh, who could it be? I give up.

Just a couple things are abundantly clear: My dreams are nothing like your dreams, and I’m a lot farther gone than I thought.


Add yours →

  1. As someone who works overnights (network maintenance) I can empathize with the lack of sleep part. In fact, I should be asleep right now!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. As to your last paragraph: I’m extremely glad that our dreams are nothing alike, and you can’t possibly get much farther gone than New Jersey.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I’ve read enough of the later Stoics, especially Epictetus, to know that such a philosophical label could never be applied to me. Pretty sure my compulsive punning puts me in the Paronomastic camp, instead.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I think you need a drink. Or a nap. Or perhaps both.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I think I may have some dickweed growing in my yard.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Jason Fredric Gilbert August 15, 2015 — 12:21 am

    Perhaps you were thinking of stage names for a new career in adult films?

    Liked by 2 people

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