Voices: Getting a grip when anger takes control

Editor’s note: Voices is an occasional series in which guest writers  express their feelings in the wake of the presidential election and what many perceive to be a drastic change in course for America, and not for the better.

By LIN LOFLEY

12243016_10153267305727683_1983256341329231651_nOK, so I think it’s officially time for me to get a grip. Y’all do what you think you need to do, but the bad feelings I have harbored since Election Night finally popped out last night, and getting that stuff off my chest didn’t make me feel better.

In dealing with a troll on a Facebook thread, the discussion being what many of us see as clear Russian interference in the election, I finally had it up to my teeth with the guy. I told him I was tired of it, and of him.

And I told him of my hope that when Obamacare is repealed, that he contract a slow, inoperable form of cancer.

And with that, I fell to his level of douchebaggery, and I didn’t like it.

There were many levels to my failure, not least of which being I ended up on the level of the troll. Of course, his fellow trolls brayed in pain at such an insult. (Bite me, I thought.)

And the message thread wasn’t my own. So a guy I like and even admire wound up pulling down the entire thread. I was glad, but I felt bad at him having do that.

My grasp on civility has become more tenuous since the election. Here are a couple of examples:

  • I’ve never been one who flips the bird in traffic — an old newspaper guy once mentioned that when he moved to Texas the first thing he did was stop gesturing at people in traffic, which seems like a good idea — but since Nov. 8, I have more frequently had to grip the wheel tightly and stare (glare) straight ahead in traffic when someone has driven poorly.
  • I have repeatedly had to bite my lip when people say they’ll be glad when Obamacare is gone, but they want to make it perfectly clear to their representatives that the Affordable Care Act should not be touched. I despair at the stupidity of people who voted for people who could come back to harm them and their families.

But there it is.

We’re just in a strange place now. We have been divided by the election, and we just want to know who we’re dealing with, something that’s often impossible to ascertain. Outside of the trolls, we don’t know anymore who voted for the president-elect. Many are wisely keeping it to themselves, but I want to know. A year from now, I’ll be surprised if we see anybody, troll or not, proclaiming their pride in what we did on Election Day.

I don’t blame people for hiding, but I’d like to know who they are anyway — so I can know exactly who it is I should despise.

Knowing that 3 million more of us voted for Hillary than did the man the Russians selected makes me feel better, but alas, I’m also distrustful of my fellow citizens.

I’ll try to get a grip. You do what you need to do.

Would you like to add your voice to the Voices series? My contact information is listed under the About Me link at the top of this page.
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4 Comments

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  1. I’ve unfriended two guys since the election, both of whom I’ve known for decades. One was a roommate in college. And it wasn’t just on Facebook; they may as well not even exist in real life as far as I’m concerned. And it isn’t just that they voted for Putin’s pal, but that they continue to support him and, in one case, flat-out told me that I need to get over my feelings and accept him as president. Not going to happen.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Good for you. There are some things I can’t justify “just getting over.”!Trump is one.

      Liked by 1 person

      • As Lin suggested, however, hanging on to that anger can’t be good for us. What’s the alternative? Ignoring this despicable turn of events won’t make it go away. I’m already a member of the ACLU, contribute to Planned Parenthood, donated to Hillary’s campaign, proudly displayed a CLINTON/KAINE sticker on my bumper and planted their sign in our front yard. Writing to our two Texas senators would, I’m sure, result in nothing more than a form letter in response; both Cornyn and Cruz are lost causes. I feel certain that Pence will be assuming office long before four years have passed, but that’s no comfort (have you noticed how, whenever he says “yes,” he shakes his head “no” — what is THAT all about?). I’m dealing with some major back pain right now, and I truly believe that despondency over the inauguration is the primary cause. Help me, Obi-Wan. You’re my only hope.

        Liked by 1 person

        • I hate to keep commenting on what is Lin Lofley’s post, but heck, it’s my blog so I will anyway! History is replete with examples of Americans taking the hard road and even dying for freedom. Given those examples, I don’t believe risking our health by holding onto our beliefs and separating from those who spit in the face of American core values (as Obama called them yesterday) is too much to ask. People have to continue to fight, even in the face of hopelessness.

          Liked by 1 person

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